Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Trade 5: First losing session

Trade: Poker session, 10:00pm - 1am
Stakes: $200 buyin
Risk: $475
Loss: -$200
Current Capital: $5,610

I've been feeling very volatile in the recent sessions, I was up 150 before I had a dinner break, and after dinner I was feeling sluggish, and I realised I play not so great on a full stomach; as I stacked off on a dangerous board with top pair.

It's good however, to get my first loss out of the way, as it was bound to happen and I'm glad I didn't keep playing as I probably would've lost the whole 500 if I had stayed; if at least I don't have the discipline to laydown top pair, I can have the discipline to leave when I know I'm not at 100% performance.

I realised how much losing 200 hurt, and I actually think it's ok to feel the pain of loss AFTER the session is over to help reflect and remember the causality of my plays, as opposed to feeling the pain of loss DURING the session and extending the losses with emotionally driven tilt - that way I will be more motivated and focused in the next session that I play. This is a big change from 2008 where losing 10k in ONE session had a huge emotional impact during the session, but pretty numbed out after the session had finished.

There is still a long way to go before I master the self discipline of this trade project, and I'm still going to keep my risks miniscule until I feel confident and disciplined into all the factors that go into making financially driven decisions.